Moonle
10-20-2005, 06:01 AM
I have a relationship in net for more than 4 years, before i hurt him,
i had a bf on net, then his friends knew that and .. he came to know
the same time as his mom's death.and his dad got married a new one, he
couldnt suffer it(he was hurt alot and ask me why could i cheat
him.that momenti regret for his real love with me, and i told him that
i hadnt known about that i thought he was playing with me and after
that i feel i love him & i showed him my love) .i was beside him
eventhough it was on net, and he passed it. but always icare about him.
During that time , we had many argument, cause he was not as before, he
forget the habit to share with me everything, and that makes me angry.
but i tried to calm down, and not to ask him what he dont talk about,
cause i m afraid of hurting him.(even i want to know his adress,but i
dont ask).Also i asked him to come and get married me ,the first time
he said we cant be together forever, next he just say i ll never get
married ,i want to be alone. I thought may he gets bad effects on his
mom's death . so i kept silent..still it lasts today, during chatting,
he told me many opposite things,( may cause i ask him too much that he
must answer hestitately) and that have made me confuse, i dont know
what he told is true ? even last year, he told me he is in love with an
old lady, she is sick and they will get married soon , and he asked me
to be their daughter.I also asked him, where am i in ur heart? replied
: The depth of my heart! So bitter! i still told him to take care of
her well, but in fact i was so hurt that i didnt contact with him for
months, then i missed him, and followed my heart. everything was going
smoothly, we didnt talk about that. But what we chated was just he
dont want me to get worried about him, and he will be worried if im
like that,when i asked him, do u miss me?many times, then he said yes,
and even he called me, just to say be happy few months ago, and i felt
his love , but always he never show it, then one day i got strong to
ask him, the first time , he said he is not loving me as the way im
loving him, and next day , i was still confused with that answer , and
asked again , he said: yes I love u ! i was little happy. Then day
after that he came online and told me he has an arranged marriage next
2 months, and he saw her, giving her his password, He even told me
about his sex with other girls, too i didnt hear that, cause im
confused with his words , i dont know if its lie again.And he told he
will never reply me. Few days ago, i missed him too much, and search
his name on Google.Many information about him there... from his adress
and his honest , warm words with others about his job- granphic
designer.I felt unfairly. and i came to know his website still working
in another name, but when i talked with him about that he just told
its closed and never gave me the new one( I just felt .. uhmm but i
thought may its his personal.. so i didnt ask)
And then i opened his new website. at the adress Google showed, from
there i saw his name with another girl. I was so angry about that
causee i saw the day she contacted with him.. its still the same time
he said he loved me. I coulndt control myself ,i broke her mailbox's
password, sent him an email in a high dudgeon to his old mail box and
his new mail box that i searched on Google. next day he replied that he
didnt read it , and his girlfriend used to open his new mail box and
read my mail. he told that im a small girl, his gf asked him about me
, and doesnt beleive,he will lose her because of me, it always happen,
he is not loving me, just he sent me mail back cause he doesnt want to
hurt me. and dont come to him, dont talk to him the old craps .and he
told im happy cause im the winner.
I was shock , really im shock with his words.and i sent sorry to him
and his gf. i didnt know that she read it. i didnt mean to break their
relationship. i dont want to hurt her, cause im also suffering hurt,i
dont want she is having the same hurt cause of me.
Still now.. i dont know who im having relationship.
I dont know if he is cheating me.or i m not strong to face the truth
that he doesnt love me.
This is not a film.
I need an advice.i want to forget him.. but still those questions
follow me , it makes me thinking of him.I cant stand !!!!
. He is an Indian.
i had a bf on net, then his friends knew that and .. he came to know
the same time as his mom's death.and his dad got married a new one, he
couldnt suffer it(he was hurt alot and ask me why could i cheat
him.that momenti regret for his real love with me, and i told him that
i hadnt known about that i thought he was playing with me and after
that i feel i love him & i showed him my love) .i was beside him
eventhough it was on net, and he passed it. but always icare about him.
During that time , we had many argument, cause he was not as before, he
forget the habit to share with me everything, and that makes me angry.
but i tried to calm down, and not to ask him what he dont talk about,
cause i m afraid of hurting him.(even i want to know his adress,but i
dont ask).Also i asked him to come and get married me ,the first time
he said we cant be together forever, next he just say i ll never get
married ,i want to be alone. I thought may he gets bad effects on his
mom's death . so i kept silent..still it lasts today, during chatting,
he told me many opposite things,( may cause i ask him too much that he
must answer hestitately) and that have made me confuse, i dont know
what he told is true ? even last year, he told me he is in love with an
old lady, she is sick and they will get married soon , and he asked me
to be their daughter.I also asked him, where am i in ur heart? replied
: The depth of my heart! So bitter! i still told him to take care of
her well, but in fact i was so hurt that i didnt contact with him for
months, then i missed him, and followed my heart. everything was going
smoothly, we didnt talk about that. But what we chated was just he
dont want me to get worried about him, and he will be worried if im
like that,when i asked him, do u miss me?many times, then he said yes,
and even he called me, just to say be happy few months ago, and i felt
his love , but always he never show it, then one day i got strong to
ask him, the first time , he said he is not loving me as the way im
loving him, and next day , i was still confused with that answer , and
asked again , he said: yes I love u ! i was little happy. Then day
after that he came online and told me he has an arranged marriage next
2 months, and he saw her, giving her his password, He even told me
about his sex with other girls, too i didnt hear that, cause im
confused with his words , i dont know if its lie again.And he told he
will never reply me. Few days ago, i missed him too much, and search
his name on Google.Many information about him there... from his adress
and his honest , warm words with others about his job- granphic
designer.I felt unfairly. and i came to know his website still working
in another name, but when i talked with him about that he just told
its closed and never gave me the new one( I just felt .. uhmm but i
thought may its his personal.. so i didnt ask)
And then i opened his new website. at the adress Google showed, from
there i saw his name with another girl. I was so angry about that
causee i saw the day she contacted with him.. its still the same time
he said he loved me. I coulndt control myself ,i broke her mailbox's
password, sent him an email in a high dudgeon to his old mail box and
his new mail box that i searched on Google. next day he replied that he
didnt read it , and his girlfriend used to open his new mail box and
read my mail. he told that im a small girl, his gf asked him about me
, and doesnt beleive,he will lose her because of me, it always happen,
he is not loving me, just he sent me mail back cause he doesnt want to
hurt me. and dont come to him, dont talk to him the old craps .and he
told im happy cause im the winner.
I was shock , really im shock with his words.and i sent sorry to him
and his gf. i didnt know that she read it. i didnt mean to break their
relationship. i dont want to hurt her, cause im also suffering hurt,i
dont want she is having the same hurt cause of me.
Still now.. i dont know who im having relationship.
I dont know if he is cheating me.or i m not strong to face the truth
that he doesnt love me.
This is not a film.
I need an advice.i want to forget him.. but still those questions
follow me , it makes me thinking of him.I cant stand !!!!
. He is an Indian.